Aurea Nova Book Club

The Story Behind Our First Pick

When we launched the Aurea Nova Book Club, we wanted our first pick to spark reflection on something universal: how we connect, communicate, and build confidence.

The choice was also rooted in the fact that neither of us had ever been taught how to network or told why building one really mattered, which led to some awkward moments and a lot of wasted energy early in our careers.

One of us went to networking sessions and did not talk, could not talk, to anyone. The silence felt endless. Over time, they built a flexible script, a few questions to help them get through the conversations, and their confidence began to grow. But once the script ran out, so did the conversation.

The other went to networking events, swapped plenty of business cards, but the conversations stayed surface level and very few genuine connections were made.

Our first Aurea Nova Book Club pick

While those days may be long behind us, when it came to choosing our first Aurea Nova Book Club read, How To Talk To Anyone by Leil Lowndes felt like a natural starting point.

This book features on many must-read lists, and it’s easy to see why when it promises confidence, connection, and ease in every conversation. We’re sure it will be perfect for many readers, our younger selves included. 

But, at this stage of our careers, it doesn’t feel like quite the right fit for us.

Notwithstanding that, we did find a few ideas that we've tweaked to maximise impact.

◾ Being with warmth. A genuine smile and open posture signal ease and safety.

◾ Remove distractions, turn to face the person you want to speak with, pause for a breath, then begin.

◾ Use the person's name once, then add a thread to help them expand e.g. “...and how did that project land?”

◾ Match their energy. Start where they are in terms of pace and tone, then move to a comfortable shared tempo.

◾ Keep it real. When asked “What do you do?”, share one clear outcome or impact, not a pitch. You might also want to practice your response to this question in advance!

What we left behind

◾ Techniques that overplay eye contact or mimicry; they can feel manipulative and aren’t always neurodiversity friendly.

◾ One size fits all scripts, because culture, context, and power dynamics matter.

A practical swap? Before any conversation, try asking yourself: “What would make this five minutes useful for both of us?”

Have you read How to Talk to Anyone? What did you think?

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Footnote

This reflection is part of the Aurea Nova Book Club and is shared for discussion and learning. We’re not affiliated with Leil Lowndes or the publishers of “How to Talk to Anyone.”